' ' ' ' ' ! Successul Psychology ‘ Make Resolutions A Family Aair—Year Round by Lawrence Kutner, Ph.D. each child when you won’t be dis- despite all our good intentions, our booklet take all o this a step urther by analyzing several dozen (NAPS)—New Year’s resolutions can be wonderul gits—not only to yoursel, but to your amily as well. The problem is that resolutions oten melt along with aieia the winter snow. By doing things a little dierently, you sd may ind that this time-honored tradi- tion can be anideal (T} way or amilies to Dr. Kutner pass on important lessons to children— lessons about planning, decisionmaking, the importance o accept- ing responsibility and o keeping tracted or called away. Rules, repairs, reinorcements The “Tony’s Time” Website and challenges aced by young chil- dren and their parents, and giving examples o how to approach them. Each challenge, which is a potential New Year’s resolution, is addressed in three ways: a Rule, one or more Repairs and a Reinorcement. The Rulesare straight- orward and simple; the Reinorcements are things parents can say to their children to encourage the behavior they want. It’s the Repairs—the things one’s wordall year round. The key is to have a new type that parents and children can do is outlined in the program known child is asked to describe what good manners “soundlike,” or to o resolution. This clever approach together whenthere’s a problem— wherethis system gets creative. A as “Tony’s Time,” which wasdeveloped to help parents teach school- create a chart to keep track o the age children about such important matters as taking responsibility and resolving conlicts peaceully. Realistic resolutions To make successul resolutions, you'll have to do three important things needed to keep a pet healthy and happy. Parents, o course, can come up with their own creative Repairs that meet their amily’s needs. The “Tony’s Time” program was things: Make commitments as a am- developed as a public service by Tony’s pizza in cooperation with Focus on the process instead o the results; and organization dedicated to ensuring that all children have the opportu- speciic and realistic. Shared resolutions are an and sae. On the program’s Web site (www.tonystime.com) you can ily instead o as individuals; Keep your goals practical, important way or amily mem- bers to demonstrate how much they care or each other. This kind o teamwork brings your amily closer together, and provides the extra support you may need to stick to your resolutions. Besides, i several o you have a vested interest in success, you’re more likely to make it happen. Stand or Children, a non-proit nity to grow up healthy, educated enter a contest that rewards you or keeping your resolutions throughout the year. To learn more, and to receive a ree copy o the “Tony’s Time”booklet, write to: Tony’s Time, P.O. Box 6079, Stacy, MN55078. Dr. Larry Kutner, one o America’s best-known psychologists, is the authoroive books or parents Remember to ocus your energies on things you can control, and on child development and parentchild communication, and a con- pieces. For example, instead o just saying you intend to spend Parenting, Family Lie and BabyTalk magazines. He is on the aculty at Harvard Medical School, where he teaches in the child and adolescent psychiatry program. break big goals downintolittle more time with your children, come up with a deinite plan—say, spending 10 minutes a day with tributing editor and columnist or
